Making My First Thought My Last... By Kandayia Ali

(1-3)Making the first thought my last was only a test to see if I have been blessed with the skills to ramble at will and assemble at best an outline, to define my quest- to be one of the few- who can make sense of the jumbles of non-sense- that in my head- kinda’ makes sense…  Now, this poem isn’t for the “literally impaired” - those who have an issue with loooong, drawn out expressions of character. No- this poem is for those who ramble, just as I- and express themselves as a chosen few of The Most High who “speak” to be felt- not always to be heard. “You feel me?” If not, it’s expected, and well respected are our differences and our right to agree to disagree. This rambled verse is about knowledge. Not the kind that you always find in college- because let’s face it- just cause you take that route- doesn’t mean that you may not have a time in your life, where you could possibly go without. What’s gained can easily be lost without you blinking your eyes- but right before them. Knowledge calls to us every 5 seconds to wake up to the days of awareness- moral statutes, positive growth and to release these “death- driven” substitutes.  Knowledge is life- living, breathing, loving, learning and exploration.  We tend to close our eyes when it points its light- guess because it will make our future so bright… Know yourself- your worth- your value or you will be underpaid, under-appreciated, over worked and soon you’ll find out that you played yourself…  Wrong and right decisions are yours to make- and the outcome of them can’t be placed on the heads of anyone else…

(2-1) Integrity- if your heart isn't in it, then your body is an empty vessel.  Sometimes we have too much “of what someone has done to us” nestled deep down in our souls. We have no room to see the potentiality of being more than what we are.  Stand firm for things in life for things that are passionate to you- positive to your growth, this may be one of the antidotes to a way-lay of dismay we sometimes find ourselves waiting for. What you make of yourself can not be created by anyone else- they can not control your life’s journey, this is your walk in evolution- most of the time, to all our problems- WE ARE THE SOLUTION.   It’s no riddle- the way my mind works- rambling on with a poem- starting in the middle. Building around it a series of things I want to say and really do mean.  Bear with me, as I take you to the next scene...

(3-2)They say, “The first will become last” and “the last will become first”- what I did was make the last set of thoughts- second in this verse. What I have to say comes in thought patterns, some may find annoying- but there is a method to my madness- I’m here to speak on happiness. No more- no less… We are the builders of our own foundation- given the fundamentals at birth to reverse a curse which we tend to ignore, as we get older. We blame or short-comings on others, allowing us to be caught up in a world wind of self-inflicted, victimized chaos. I refuse to believe that any man is product of his environment- ONLY TO KNOW that he will always be the producer of it. We have been given that gift- so if happiness is something you want to uphold- and uplift- the choice has always been yours. Free-will has never been so prominent in our daily lives and decisions.  Be dominant: YOU CHOOSE- your way of life- focus on TRUTH being your only religion…

Reprogramming Your Thoughts: AUTO-PILOT THEM!

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With this paragraph, you will be able to find yourself thinking about the message even when you are done reading it! It takes a while, I know, to understand the whole picture at first- but the key is to get your mind in the thought process of seeing things in a different prospective. Once you learn this, your goals will be much easier to achieve due to your ability to envision in a subconscience state. I designed this as a practice tool for my children, so that they can see that we are "trained" to see things a certain way but our minds can still decrypt and process data that we over look- or that at first we don't understand- but later on down the line- we interpret through mental relay of information. TV, music, books, actions, lifestyle, all this can be aligned in our lives to meet our standards and goals- we just have to program them in so that we are thinking of them without us "really" thinking at all!

Reliving Whitney :: So Much Life Before Her Death

This year, the music industry lost one of the history’s greatest who has ever held a microphone and graced the stage with encore performances. Whitney Houston was more than just a singer; in her walk through life she has been a wife, a mother, a daughter, a friend and even more so, she has been considered close family. No one can truly understand the reasons why those who seem to have it all, still seem to be searching in life for something more. Whitney Elizabeth Houston was no different. Her rise and fall- then rise again only led to a tragic ending and beginning of a void in history that only she could fill.

“God gave me a voice to sing with, and when you have that, what other gimmick is there?"    –Whitney Houston

Whitney quickly moved from fashion model, to professional singer to find herself on her way to the top of the Billboard Charts. She appeared on the covers on Seventeen and Glamour magazines before becoming a major recording artist. Whitney's singing career began in the local gospel choir but she moved on to back-up singing with the likes of Lou Rawls and Chaka Khan, when she also worked as a model. She hadn’t walked too far away from her mother, Cissy’s footsteps, who was one of the back-up vocalists for Elvis Presley and a host of other performing artists in that era. Her time in the spotlight had begun. Whitney tried her luck at becoming an actress and almost received the role of Sondra Huxtable on "The Cosby Show" (1984); but the role went to Sabrina Le Beauf, whose theater experience was more profound.

At the age of 18, Whitney was signed to record label Arista Records, with whom she produced the album, 'Whitney Houston' with 'Saving All My Love for You' earning her a Grammy Award.  On to her second album, titled 'Whitney', which was the first album by a woman to enter at number one on the charts. Its first four singles all made #1 in the Billboard chart. Multi-Grammy award winning singer; has had an unequaled run of seven consecutive #1 records (1980s) in the USA, and held the #1 spot on Billboard's Hot 100 for 14 weeks with "I Will Always Love You" in 1993. Whitney Houston was a female, African American singer and actress whose first four albums, released between 1985 and 1992, and had amassed global sales in excess of 86 million copies. Whitney had made her own path, exceeding expectations and being crowned the only artist that holds the record for winning the most American Music Awards, twenty-six in total. During which, she still had time to drop by and be declared by People magazine as one of the 50 Most Beautiful People in the world.

Whitney was not done showcasing the talent she as blessed with, and she stated her reign in fame with a powerful acting debut in the film 'The Bodyguard' and the biggest hit of her career, the theme song, 'I Will Always Love You'. The single stayed 10 weeks at the top of the UK charts and the soundtrack album sold over 37 million copies. During the year of 1992, Whitney married Boddy Brown, former New Edition member at the time. They wed on 18 July 1992 and Houston gave birth to her only child Bobbi Kristina Houston Brown on 4 March 1993. During this time, Houston focused on her acting, appearing in 'Waiting to Exhale' in 1995 as the lead character - a TV producer in love with a married man. It opened at number one and grossed $87 million worldwide, while the cast were given positive reviews as an ensemble. The coinciding soundtrack for the film also reached #1. In 1996, Houston starred in 'The Preacher's Wife' with Denzel Washington. She earned $10 million for her role, making her one of the highest paid actresses in Hollywood at the time and the highest earning African-American actress of the period.

During the early 2000’s, Whitney Houston’s life became a big blur and a open case for the tabloids to attack. Every chance that was given to place Whitney’s face amidst drugs abuse, mental and emotional issues, family dysfunction and humiliation- it was taken during this time. Any attempts to make a comeback seemed almost impossible. In 2006, Houston began to rebuild her career in the public eye by attending the Carousel of Hope Ball in October 2006 and Clive Davis's Pre-Grammy Party in February 2007. She recorded the song "Family First" with Dionne Warwick and her mother, Cissy Houston for the soundtrack 'Daddy's Little Girls'. During this time, Houston had also divorced Bobby Brown and gained full parental custody of their daughter, Bobbi Kristina and began work on a new album. After almost a decade of turmoil, the singer returned to the studio and released her comeback album, 'I Look To You', in 2009. It shot to the top of the charts, giving Houston her first number one album since 'The Bodyguard'

In 2010, the singer began a world tour - her first in more than ten years. However, Houston's sometimes shaky performances led to some negative reviews, with reports of fans walking out of some concerts. She was also forced to pull out of some appearances due to illness. It was widely reported in May 2011 that Houston had returned to rehab for drug and alcohol treatment. A representative for the star said she entered the program voluntarily as part of her "long-standing recovery process". Whitney said that she was “cleansing herself”. She had a plan, and in September 2011, the Hollywood Reporter revealed that Houston would produce and star in a remake of the 1976 film 'Sparkle'. She first obtained the rights to the film in 2001.

Houston died in Los Angeles on the eve of the Grammy Awards on 11 February 2012. She was found dead in her room at the Beverly Hilton Hotel. Cause of death has been revealed as accidental drowning with heart disease and drug abuse playing their part.  Her funeral was held at the New Hope Baptist Church in Newark, New Jersey on Saturday, February 18, 2012. Following services, she was laid to rest beside her father at Fairview Cemetery in Westfield, New Jersey.

Whitney left so much of herself behind, in the eyes of her friends and family. No matter what, she will always be known for these things mentioned and more. We have yet to experience the peace that was felt through her music from any other performance artist in their own right. She is, was and will always be a rare jewel.

Whitney has a school named after her (1997) formerly Franklin School, now the Whitney E. Houston School of Creative and Performing Arts in her hometown of East Orange, New Jersey.

“I almost wish I could be more exciting, that I could match what is happening out there to me.” –Whitney Houston

### Contacting Kandayia Ali, writer of “The Urban Arts Heads-Up” Reviews: Email: UrbanArts3000@gmail.com Phone: 305-771-4779 Twitter: @JagudEye